The health of the helper (Lesson 2)

A couple of days ago I found myself getting very tired, a bone-tired sort of thing. Also a little dizzy. On Friday I started to get a sore throat, the kind of soarness you might get when you are feeling sad and doing a lot of talking. "Sheesh," I told myself, "you are not drinking enough water and the stress of this circumstance is starting to get you down. How long can you sustain this effort?"

Then on Saturday, when I had a moment to really relax, I realized it was not stress alone at all. My allergies had just kicked in big time. When they do, I get extremely tired (like right now), get a sore throat, and headaches. Then a runny nose appears later that only gets worse.

I had to really find a little grim humor in how I was originally thinking. In a way I was kinda relieved. Sure this is stressful, working with survivor families and with other volunteers who are affected in the work. Seeing the stories on television of those affected by Katrina has an effect. But at least my physical problems were not completely associated with the emotional experience. I say completely, because of course stress can affect allergies to some extent. When I associated what I was feeling with the experience of volunteering, it kinda frightened me. I mean, this was difficult, but not that BAD-BAD, not at all like the volunteers working with huge numbers of families in Texas. If I was going to begin to crumble with this circumstance, how could I ever be able to contribute under BAD-BAD circumstances? So realizing that my physical misery had nothing really to do with the volunteering was a relief.

Even so, I did discover how easy it is to stop drinking water when things got very busy and emotional. The first day I did not drink nearly enough. I think we all realized that and were quick to remind each other to keep a water bottle nearby. Urgency tends to narrow a helper's focus beyond oneself. We were more focused on providing water to visitors than for ourselves. Creating mental space for self-care during such periods is VERY important. I knew all this in an intellectual way. It was not until I got so wrapped up in the rush that I realized how easy it is to put it off and neglect one's own health. That's why all the volunteers should help each other to stay healthy to stay strong for those we hope to help.